The Daily Grind
By Rob Manning

Can't we all just get along...

In the words of Holden McNeil (Ben Affleck’s character in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back) the internet is for “slandering others anonymously.” This rings true no other place than in the world of cycling on the internet.

Being in the magazine business affords all of us at the MBT office ample time to cruise around on message boards and forums all over the internet. Recently it seems there have been a rash of idiots out there, cruising the boards, slandering others behind a mask of anonynimity. There are posts about roadies being dicks, downhillers being stoners, XC racers being leg shaving weenies, and every other derogatory stereotype on the face of the earth. The perpetrators of these internet molestations, often termed “trolls” live to incite e-riots and cause a ruckus. Other users with good intentions will appear out of the woodwork to do battle with the mythical e-beasts. But no matter how substantial their armament of logical thinking and sound arguments, a troll can not be defeated through verbal combat (there has never been a case that I’m aware of in which a troll is dispatched through physical contact, although I’m sure it’s probably happened somewhere.) The legions of good will always lose to the single perpetrator of darkness.

The only way to flush out a troll and rid the forums of such maniacs is to ignore them. Use the ignore button, skip their posts and forget they ever exist; the troll derives its life source from attention, and removing that life force causes the troll to shrivel and die (or give up and go elsewhere looking for fresh meat.)

Why do I bother to rant about such people? Well, despite my study of them, a la Jane Goodall and her gorillas, I’m still unsure why they are so clueless. Perhaps it’s just my perception, but it seems silly to me to attack anyone who rides on two wheels. I ride regularly on 2.25 inch knobbies, dropping off walls, riding skinnies and tearing up the singletrack (figuratively tearing it up, don’t send me any hate mail) but I also love to pull on the lycra, strap on the flyweight helmet and clip into my road bike with 700x23 tires and scorch the asphalt. I’m not a downhiller (my insurance coverage isn’t good enough for that) and I’m not an XC racer, and although I don’t understand their respective subcultures, I do respect and appreciate each of them. Similarly, I know that there are many people who don’t understand but still respect my unhealthy obsession with pushing a 53x11 gear until I puke. Good for them; I’ll never be pushing the ignore button when I see their posts online.

Bottom line? We all ride on two wheels, whether we get dirty and gritty or stay sparkling clean in a white skinsuit. Going downhill or suffering on the climb back up, we’re all still pushing the pedals somehow. Let’s get over the petty differences and cut to the chase: we’re all cyclists and we should be sticking together. There will always be trolls out there, trying to divide and conquer, but we need to stand fast and close ranks to keep them out. Or we can take Holden’s other advice: “there’s nothing you can do, short of going to their houses and kicking all their asses.” Well played Holden, well played.

Questions? Comments? Love letters? Send 'em to Techeditor@mountainbiketales.com.